While I was sitting here wondering if I should write something witty today on my blog I figured I would pass a little time by checking my e-mail. Most days it isn’t worth checking my e-mail at all as I don’t receive much in the way of REAL e-mails. Mostly I get my e-mail addresses filled with 100 million spams. Never anything I would actually bother to open. I get the usual spam that is about drugs, sex and no not rock n roll. It would at least be interesting if it were about rock n roll. I get all those e-mails from all those poor souls in third world countries with way too much money that they are only too happy to share with me if I would just give them my bank details. Aren’t they just the sweetest people? By the looks of all my e-mail addresses I would say there can’t be too many people starving in these third world countries since it would seem the majority of people from these countries are sending me e-mails.

Speaking of starving people. One of the e-mails I received today was pics of celebrity mansions. I don’t begrudge anybody making a fortune and using that fortune to live in mansions that are nothing less than extreme and vulgar displays of their wealth. More power to you and you are entitled to live any damn way you want. On the other hand I am completely offended by these same ‘richer than God’ assholes telling the rest of us hard working tax paying citizens what we should be happily willing to give up in order to save the world. You know so they can feel better about themselves.

These same dipshits seem to be under the impression that a family where both parents have to work to make ends meet have deeper pockets to pick than they do. I have an idea how to save the world! All these rich assholes can drop dead and give their money to the poor and starving. Since the lifestyles of the rich are by far the biggest contributors to global warming, by dropping dead they would ensure the survival of the planet. If they gave all their collective money to the poor and starving there would be no poor and starving. But what the hell let them keep complaining about the peasants. As history shows when the peasants have their fill of bullshit it always ends with a lot of dead rich people. I can see why so many rich people love communism. Keep those peasants in their place! Don’t be fooled by socialism it is just the means to the end.

The e-mail I most enjoyed today was an e-mail reflecting on old age. Well actually I enjoyed up to the part about “I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60&70’s” and realized this email was talking about people in my age group. At this point I finished reading this e-mail only because I wanted to know what this F%#&*# idiot was on about. So a dumb kid thought she was old. I remember when I thought 30 was old. I don’t hold that belief any longer maybe because 30 has been hell and gone for a long time. A woman does not encourage the kid’s belief by pondering old age. You slap the damn kid and tell it to show a little respect to adults. Never mind that I could relate to the e-mail… sorta! To admit to relating to the e-mail completely would be to confirm I’m old. That’s not happening any time soon I can promise you!

I know several elderly (old) people and I can guarantee I am not them and they are not me. They unlike me seem to have developed a special relationship with their doctors. They unlike me take all kind of pills for their ills not their thrills. They unlike me get discounts on everything. They have more than just crows feet to show their age, and seeing them naked is something I would really rather not think about. They unlike me went from pondering the universe to forgetting they even live in one. Finally they unlike me are old!

This e-mail has prompted me to write on the subject of what it means to be an over forty fabulous female. I’ll post it tomorrow if I don’t die from old age in the meantime.